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How do I define a guilty pleasure? Well I have many, many, many guilty pleasures when it comes to music “one hit wonders” but what about those movies that don’t get seen by many folks, or those films that are torn apart by the critics but loved by lots of movie fans? I’m not talking cult films, just movies that didn’t work on many levels but some how worked for me, or maybe you!? It’s o.k. to be slightly embarrassed if you like these titles.

Some movies below are recent films that were duds and some movies are mis-fires or just have never been heard of before for some reason or other by many folks. I personally have watched these movies over and over and have recommended them to the casual DVD renter and movie fan. They are hardly artistic or great pieces of art, but they entertained me. Have you seen these titles?

1.) “ELVIRA MISTRESS OF THE DARK”

Sad to say, but this is one of my favorite film comedies ever. I was a gay little 11 year old when this came out and I must have seen it in the theaters at least 3 times (and many many times on VHS). It holds up to today’s comedy standards pretty well I think. Although it should be rated PG-13 and not PG.

2.) “THE LEGEND OF BILLIE JEAN”

“Fair is Fair!” is this films catch phrase which still echoes in my mind and the hit Pat Benatar song “Invincible” still rocks today. I love the underlined teen empowerment message this movie has. As a kid I wanted to shave my head and start a revolution. Although this movie is dated, it sure is fun to watch.

3.) “PAULIE”

3 years after “Babe” came out “Paulie” was released. Buddy Hackett lost the role of the voice of Paulie the parrot to Jay Mohr who did an impression of Budddy Hackett. This charming family film will pull at your heart strings and the ending will leave you in tears.

4.) “SOAPDISH”

The brilliant ensemble cast and inspired soap opera ending of this movie are to die for. I loved the over the top acting, plot and twist ending in “Soapdish” so much I watched this film 3 times in the theater when it was released in the summer of 1991. Sally Field is comic gold in this movie, she has never been so hilarious!

5.) “DROP DEAD GORGEOUS”

This fake documentary or “mock-umentary” is chock full of hilarious site gags and jokes about beauty pageants. Kristin Dunst is great in one of her first starring roles. The movie’s ending will leave you in stitches. And look for the scene with a previous beauty pageant winner performing Melissa Manchester’s “Don’t Cry Out Loud”…priceless.

6.) “WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER”

This film is a farce much like “Airplane”, “Hot Shots”, “Naked Gun” and “Scary Movie”. This time around teen sex comedies from the late 70’s early 80’s like “Meatballs”, “Porky’s” etc. mocked. This movie is full of SNL cast members, members of “The State” and some comedy veterans (Paul Rudd, Jenean Garofalo). I love the subversive silly over the top humor in this movie.

7.) “LADY IN THE WATER”

This movie is reviled by critics and wasn’t touched by movie fans last summer. I personally was touched by the fantasy elements and the performances by the cast. Parts comedy and part fantasy/bedtime story, this movie is cute enough for repeat viewings, but still leaves me feeling guilty for loving it so much.

8.) “CLUE”

This is a fun movie, with classical comedic actors like Madeline Kahn and Tim Curry. The multiple endings are fun and innovative for a film. Who really makes movies based on board games? Well currently there are movies in the works based on “Battleship”, “Candyland” and “Monopoly”.

9.) “HOW TO MAKE AN AMERICAN QUILT”

This is a total “chick flick” and a manipulative weepy, but it works. Think of this as the white persons “Joy Luck Club” or “Waiting to Exhale”…with old chicks. I love Winona Ryder in this movie more than the dreadful “Girl, Interrupted”.

10.) “SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW”

This awesome, sleek, fun movie didn’t make a dent when it was released at the box office. It is a repeated entertaining film with great visuals and nuanced performances. This is the little movie that should have been bigger in my book.

1.) “THE DOOM GENERATION”

To say this movie is bizarre is an understatement. “The Doom Generation” is full of symbolism, obscure references and odd imagery. This is my favorite film by gay film maker Greg Araki. The cast includes a new to Hollywood Rose McGowan and Christina Applegate’s recent ex-husband Jonathan Shaech.

There are also some other neat celebrity cameo’s to keep your eye out for. There is a scene where Jonathan Shaech’s character eats his own jizm which needs to be seen to be believed. The ending of this film and some of the plot drivers may be too weird for some people, but this movie has a haunting effect that stays with you long after you watch it.

2.) “POOTIE TANG”

This movie is so outrageous, silly and bizarre….it is hard to describe but is still a hilarious film. “Pootie Tang” is the local pimp/super hero who speaks his own made up language which most people around him can understand.

“Pootie Tang” is dumb and a one note joke, but there is something pretty genius about the premise. Hearing Pootie say “Wazatu, Wazitay” still makes me laugh. In short there are some really subversive and brilliant elements to this crazy movie that makes it worth viewing at least once. How this movie was made is still a mystery to me though.

3.) “BATTLE ROYALE”

This movie’s premise alone is enough reason for some people to avoid it. “Battle Royale” is set in modern day Japan when social issues like over crowding and inconsiderate youth culture have become big problems.

The solution? The government puts 30 high school kids on an island, and each one is given a different weapon to battle it out to the death, the last one standing wins. This grisly movie has some great underlined social commentary and a few darkly comedic moments that will leave you in shock.

4.) “SERIES 7: THE CONTENDERS”

Before Primetime reality shows became huge in pop culture this movie asked a poignant question which has since become a moral issue with such programming; “where do you draw the line”? “Series 7: The Contenders” is filmed like it is part network t.v. show and part documentary.

In present day America there is a government lottery in place that requires every person over 18 years of age to participate in. The people chosen must hunt each other down and kill each other as it is aired on live t.v. The goal is to be the only person left alive.

Some of the contestants “competing” are a 18 year girl, a 65 year old nurse, a pregnant woman and a young man recovering from cancer. “Series 7″ is at times hilarious and shocking. This movie is ahead of its time and eerily echoes the state of t.v. in today’s society. I consider this movie one of my all time favorite films.

5.) “SUDDENLY LAST SUMMER”

This may be the oldest movie here, but it I am certain it still able to shock most people. Set in the early 50’s Tennessee Williams crafts a story about a gay man who uses his wealthy mother and cousin as bait to attract men without their knowledge.

Elizabeth Taylor (in her prime) plays a traumatized young woman who witnesses her own cousin eaten by homeless street children and is soon after committed to a mental institution by her aunt. To hide the shameful truth of what her niece knows and has witnessed, the aunt (played by an evil Katherine Hepburn) arranges for her to get a lobotomy. Famous closet case, and major hottie, Montgomery Clift plays the doctor who has to perform the surgery…and if anything that is pretty ironic.

6.) “LOST HIGHWAY”

This psychological thriller directed by David Lynch is stranger than any other of his other odd films. It is a crime film, arguably an example of contemporary film noir, but with surreal imagery and themes. The movie is about what Lynch calls “psychogenic fugue”, a person suffering from it creates in their mind a completely new identity, new friends, new home, new everything—they forget their past identity.

This movie is similar to a couple of other Lynch movie/puzzles that require you to watch them a few times for it to start to make sense (like the awesome “Twin Peaks” Fire Walk With Me” and “Mulholland Drive”).

7.) “NAKED LUNCH”

I read this book in high school before experimenting with drugs and counter culture and it was a ridiculously hard read. When I first saw this film in the movie theaters at age 16 I was completely mortified and perplexed.

This movie is very trippy and at times can be creepy. “Naked Lunch” also has some pretty innovative images but you need to have an open mind to get most of this movies themes. But even then it will still confuse most people.

8.) “THE HOUSE OF YES”

This fun, irreverent dark comedy may creep some people out, but the writing and acting make this movie outstanding. Parker Posey plays a mentally ill sibling who still lives at home with her family.

As the movie evolves we find out that she has had an incestuous relationship in the past with her brother. When they were kids they would even re-enact the assassination of President Kennedy (JFK was played by her brother and Posey’s character would play Jackie O). Years later when her brother brings home his new fiance (played by Tori Spelling) the drama unfolds in a bizarre climax.

9.) “DESPERATE LIVING”

John Water’s has always been subversive and outrageous, but this early VERY low budget film of his takes the cake. After murdering her husband, uptight (and slightly mentally ill) suburbanite Peggy Gravel (Mink Stole) and her heavyset maid Grizelda escape to the filthy fairytale land/shantytown of Mortville.

Mortville is ruled by the evil lesbian Queen Carlotta and her developmentally disabled daughter Princess Coo-Coo. There are just too many silly, campy, over the top moments in this movie to point out which is the craziest, the whole movie is just a silly ride.

10.) “PALINDROMES”

This movie has a some what normal plot, but the execution of the acting is what makes it so strange and quite unknown. Director Todd Solondz uses 5 different actresses of varying ages and races to depict a 12 year old girl who is determined to become pregnant so she knows what is like to be loved by someone.

The movie is raw, graphic, beautiful, brilliant and disturbing. If you can get over the experimental depcition of the young girl being played by 4 adult actresses you will begin to see the haunting, brilliant message that underlines this gorgeous, strange film.

1.) “Hedwig & The Angry Inch”

This movie is emotionally charged, has a great main character, campy dialog w/ quotable scenes and best of all…the best rock n’ roll tunes to come out of a movie EVER! Hedwig will make you laugh, cry and sing out loud. This movie is the best modern day musical movie adaptation, period!

2.) “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”

Another movie with a great rockin’ soundtrack is this cult classic. As a kid I often would sneak out to midnight screenings of “Rocky Horror” and would watch in awe at the interactive circus. I love Susan Sarandon in her first film role ever as Janet, her and Tim Curry chew up each scene they are in with pitch perfect campy results.

3.) “Little Shop of Horrors”

It has always been a dream of mine to play Seymour in a local musical rendition stage play of this movie. Frank Oz directs a camp filled hilarious “horror” musical with fabulous results. Steve Martin is inspired casting as “the Dentist” and each one of the songs are catchy and infectious.

4.) “Dancer In The Dark”

This movie is depressing and down right sad. But Bjork gives a remarkable performance as a victimized single mother who is going blind. The soundtrack to this movie called “Selma Songs” is brilliantly haunting. We watch Selma go through one traumatic experience after another and her only escape is her imagination. The images and topics touched on in this film make it one of the most original movie musicals ever made.

5.) “The Nightmare Before Christmas”

This is my favorite animate film of all time, so how could it not have made this list? The song’s are classic and timeless. The direction and beautiful stop motion animation make it a marvel to look at. It is a family holiday classic that will last generations to come.

6.) “Evita”

This is Madonna’s best acting performance ever and the role she was meant to play all her life. Some would say that this is the point where Madonna even started singing better. She even won the Golden Globe for best Actress in a Comedy or Musical. I love the soundtrack just because it is Madonna but really do love the tender Oscar winning song “You Must Love Me”.

7.) “Moulin Rouge”

As experimental and modern as this film tries to be, it reminds me of old time musicals the most. Moulin Rouge is responsible for the movie musical Renaissance period we are currently experiencing in cinema. Baz Luhrman recreated a dead genre and made young people excited about movie musicals again. Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGreggor give two of the best acting performances in a movie musical ever!

8.) “Hairspray”

My favorite movie of all time ended up becoming a terrific and uplifting movie musical. “Hairspray” is witty, silly and fun. It was the perfect little sleeper hit that spiced up a dreary summer movie season. A dead funny performance by John Travolta and an uplifting story make this musical an instant classic.

9.) “Chicago”

Catherine Zeta-Jones deserved the Oscar she won for her role in this classic movie musical. The sleek and stylish direction and choreography make this a throw back to the classic musicals of the 70’s like “Cabaret”. Adding a bit of social commentary and hip imagery “Chicago” is the sexiest film on this list.

10.) “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory”

I bet you forgot this was a musical, didn’t you? But how could you forget the classic tunes “The Candy Man” or “Pure Imagination”? At times this movie was creepy, hilarious and magical. Gene Wilder gives an inspired performance as the wacky main character. I prefer this movie over the Tim Burton remake any day.

11.) “Labyrinth”

This obscure cult classic is on this list because I love Muppets! Not only does David Bowie give a cool as ice performance but we get great muppet characters and visual effects with catchy 80’s era sounding tunes. Also, check out the cute as a button future Oscar winner Jennifer Connelly in one of her first roles at age 16.

12.) “The Wizard of Oz”

This is the oldest film on my list and the one film that has stood up to the test of time. Everyone knows the songs and can quote the film at the drop of a dime. Watching Judy Garland sing “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” still pulls at my heart strings.

13.) “Annie”

As a kid I watched this movie a lot, and one summer a bit too much. It is the quintessential kids movie musical. I love Carol Burnett’s outrageous performance in this movie. And who doesn’t love the iconic songs “Tomorrow” or “It’s A Hard Knock Life”?

14.) “Dreamgirls”

I love this film for one reason and one reason only….Jennifer Hudson. She is a revelation as Effy in this movie, which is why it was no shock that she won the Oscar in 2006.

15.) Jesus Christ Superstar

As a kid I loved the “Jesus Christ Superstar” soundtrack record even though I had never seen the movie. As an adult I love the funky juxtaposition of watching a bunch of stoner looking hippies playing the groovy part of Jesus’s followers. The music kicks ass in this movie, and I’m an atheist!

RUNNERS UP: Bugsy Malone, Popeye, Bedknobs and Broomsticks, The Wiz, My Fair Lady, South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut, Xanadu

#1 - “The Nightmare Before Christmas”

Tim Burton’s mind blowing trippy claymation tale serves up a two punch holiday treat, which is great for watching starting at Halloween all the way to Christmas! Every inch of this film is unique and creative down to every memorable song to the minor background details. This cartoon gets the most repeat viewings than any other title on this list.

#2 - “The Iron Giant”

When “The Iron Giant” came out cartoon fans around the world were in the midst of a bad period in Hollywood feature film animation. The lush hand drawn images (which is no longer used as a format of animation) from “The Iron Giant” are breathtaking. Director/Screenwriter Brad Bird has gone on to create “The Incredibles” and “Ratatouille” for Pixar. The simple story of a boy and a giant robot in Cold War era U.S.A. will tug at your heart strings and leave you warm and fuzzy afterward.

#3 - “The Emperor’s New Groove”

This film makes me laugh out loud the hardest and it never fails to amuse me after multiple viewings. “Emperor” is one of the last hand drawn cell animated films that Disney made, which is a shame because the colors and backgrounds in this film are beautiful. The outstanding vocal talents of David Spade, Eartha Kitt and Patrick Warburton are some of the best animated comedic vocal work ever! This movie has more laughs than any other title on this list and that is saying a lot.

#4 - “Finding Nemo”

One of the best animated comedies ever, and in my opinion the best Pixar and computer animated film ever created. “Finding Nemo” gives a shout out to all of the single father’s in the world with a touching tender dad and son story and gorgeous animation. Ellen Degeneres is remarkable and hilarious as Dory. I use so many one liners from this movie it isn’t even funny…..”shark bait”.

#5 - “South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut”

The best adult cartoon EVER made is hands down “South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut”. The movie even garnered a best song Academy Award nomination. Critics and fans alike loved the nasty, over the top humor and side splitting cultural references. This movie will shock you and then make you laugh uncontrollably. This movie is not for kids, thank god!

#6 - “The Spongebob Squarepants Movie”

Here is a cartoon feature that is more for kids but has a lot of subversive humor for adults to chuckle at. For instance when Patrick and SpongeBob get drunk off of ice cream it is too funny for words. Spongebob is one of the best animated characters of all time and this movie perfectly embodies the silly, love-able tone that the t.v. show has.

#7 - “The Secret of Nimh”

My love for rats as a child made this movie an obvious choice. This was the first glimpse I got of animal cruelty and lab animals as a child and it haunts me still to this day. The gorgeous and classical hand drawn animation by genius Don Bluth could not be recreated by computers from today’s animation studios. This movie is a good way to introduce children to respecting little creatures, even the gross ones.

#8 - “The Secret Adventures of Tom Thumb”

This disturbing, warped analogy of modern society, genetics and science is an emotional roller coaster. With no dialog and multiple forms of animation techniques used this is the most bizarre film on my list. It is a hidden gem and not many people know of it, so if you like odd demented fairy tales than this is your film. “The Secret Adventures of Tom Thumb” is a marvel to look at. It is fun to count the many ways in which the creators used various types of animation in just one scene, you will be amazed and scared.

#9 - “Fantasia”

This movie has always been considered one of the best animated films of all time. Ahead of its time, “Fantasia” was at the same time seen as high art and as drug propaganda when it came out. I can see why, the classically drawn animation and color pallet are remarkable and tease the eye. The music and animation are perfectly matched. This is like an extended Mtv music video, before Mtv was even around. This film is one of Walt Disney’s most brilliant ideas ever.

#10 - “Beauty & The Beast”

The songs on this film are some of my favorite from an any animated film. The mix of hand drawn animation and CGI was ahead of its time when “Beauty & The Beast” was released. This is still the first animated film to ever be nominated for best feature film by the Academy of Motion Pictures. It swept the music categories at the Oscar’s in 1991 and has gone down in history as one of the crowning jewels of one of Disney’s golden periods.

#11 - “The Last Unicorn”

This early 80’s era cartoon is a bit heavy and has a haunting message. As a kid some of the images in this film scared the hell out of me. As an adult I have learned to love the harsh underlined moral and sad premise. This film is another hand drawn masterpiece with so much detail and energy put into the lush backgrounds and the scenic details. The music is corny but for any fan they will bring you back to when you first saw this movie.

#12 - “Fantastic Planet”

This is my favorite Sci-Fi animated movie, and one of all time favorite Sci-Fi flicks ever. This movie is definitely “trippy” and weird, but also a refreshing change of pace from the soft cheesy Disney-esque animation we are used to. This film also doesn’t have much dialog which is made up for with it’s bizarre martian landscapes, odd creatures and somewhat horrific premise. This has to be seen to be believed.

#13 - “The Fox & The Hound”

This movie taught me more about friendship and about the differences in people more than any other cartoon growing up. The cute as hell animated main characters resemble school yard kids going through the growing pains of youth. The mellow, soft animation and terrific narration make this a subtle family classic.

#14 - “Alice In Wonderland”

This film was the wackiest and silliest Disney cartoon around growing up. I love the faithfulness to the story book classic and the huge cast of characters. I still find myself singing the songs from this animated film to this day. I watched this movie a bit too much as a kid. The drug references were lost on me as a kid, but now as an adult, it is worth viewing once again. It is a timeless cartoon that never loses its charm.

#15 - “Heavy Metal”

I picked this film because it is one of the best adult cartoons ever drawn. This movie is at times scary, gory, funny, subversive and silly like a Looney Toons cartoon. The music hasn’t stood up to the test of time but the silly stoner charm has kept up after the years. Where else can you see animated aliens snorting cosmic cocaine? Classic!

HONORABLE MENTION:

“Princess Mononoke”
“All Dogs Go To Heaven”
“The Jungle Book”
“Gay Purree”
“The Phantom Tollbooth”
“Who Framed Roger Rabbit?”
“The Hobbit”
“The Incredible Mr. Limpet”
“Shrek”
“A Bugs Life”
“Charlotte’s Web”

MOVIES:

“Knocked Up”
“Surf’s Up”
“Ratatouille”
“Sicko”
“Blades of Glory”

DVD RENTALS:

“Deliver Us From Evil”
“Apocalypto”
“Breach”
“Jesus Camp”
“Music & Lyrics”
“The Illusionist”

MUSIC ALBUMS:

Feist - “The Reminder”
Amy Winehouse - “Back to Black”
Robin Thicke - “The Evolution of Robin Thicke”
Peter, Bjorn & John - “Writer’s Block”
Fujiya & Miyagi - “Transparent Things”
Mika - “Life In Cartoon Motion”
Of Montreal - “Hissing Fauna, Are You The Destroyer?”
The Arcade Fire - “Neon Bible”

MUSIC SINGLES:

Of Montreal - “Gronlandic Edit”
Pink - “U & Ur Hand”
Peter, Bjorn & John - “Young Folks” (play song below)

Kelly Clarkson - “One Minute”
Rufus Wainwright - “Rules & Regulations”
Hellogoodbye - “Here In Your Arms” (play song below)

Mika - “Relax (Take It Easy)”
The Fratellis - “Chelsea Dagger”
Feist - “1 2 3 4″
!!! - “Heart of Hearts” (play song below)

TELEVISION:

“Big Love”
“Flight of the Conchords”
“The Soup”
“Crime & Punishment”
“Big Brother”
“Top Chef”
“Creature Comforts”
“John From Cincinatti”
“Monique’s Charm School”

WORST MOVIES:

“Norbit”
“Arthur & The Invisibles”
“Spiderman 3″
“Epic Movie”
“Bridge to Tarabithia”

WORST MUSIC:

Daughtry
Fall Out Boy
Jennifer Lopez
Elliott Yamin
Beyonce

WORST TELEVISION:

“Gray’s Anatomy”
“America’s Got Talent”
“The Lot”
“The Tyra Banks Show”
“Pirate Master”

I could create a top ten list based on quality, craftsmanship and talent of the directors, writers and actors…but I prefer to be honest with my choices so lets see how “crazy” my views on good cinema are. What constitutes a movie to be labeled as a “favorite”? I think multiple viewings, quotable potential and ability to relate to the themes in it are reasons enough. All of these films I have picked are groundbreaking and have appeal that has potential to last for decades (at least in my opinion). I have seen every movie on this list more than a dozen time each, some a hundred times sadly to say.

Here they are:

#10 - “Hedwig & The Angry Inch”

So out of my favorite musicals of all time, this one wins. Beating out “Dancer In The Dark”, “Little Shop Of Horrors” & “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” this movie has the edge! Full of transsexual jokes, wonderful directing and a kick ass soundtrack this movie will stay with you long after viewing it just once! John Cameron Mitchell’s performance make this movie movie timeless and sweet! This is a tour de force in acting and filming!

#9 - “Secrets & Lies”

This movie is not for the lighthearted and weepy types. The storyline is emotionally crippling and rips your heart out. The out of this world acting by Brenda Blethyn makes this my favorite British film of all time. After watching it you will most likely get chills like I did when you find out how director Mike Leigh’s prefers to make his movies. He has his actors read the storyline, but improvise ALL of their dialog and staging…this has to be seen to be believed!

#8 - “The Secret Adventures Of Tom Thumb”

I was going to put more traditional animated fare here as my favorite animated movie, but this movie has made such an impression on me that I cannot shake. “The Nightmare Before Christmas”, “The Secret Of Nimh” and “Beauty & The Beast” may be more traditional and some of my other faves, but this movie wreaks of originality and was made for adults. The many, many variations of animation used to film this movie leave you wide eyed and slack jawed. The movie has little dialog but says so much with its allegorical story telling. Rent this today if you like weird, dark obscure art films with a kiddie vibe. I own it, that’s how much I love it.

#7 - “Night Of The Living Dead”

Horror movies and family films are my favorite genres, I know that is quite the polar opposite of likes. But they both make you give into the absurd, almost ridiculous subject matter they portray. This movie is the grandaddy of all horror movies. Made for almost nothing, this movie started a midnight movie revolution. Racially charged scenes, matricide and cannibalism make this movie an innovator of filmed controversial subject matter. Breaking down doors in Hollywood, this movie created the scariest movie monster ever to be filmed and paved the way for all independent films that followed.

#6 - “Muriel’s Wedding”

How can you not fall in love with the movie that gave us the talent power houses Rachel Griffiths and Toni Collette? This movie is so easy to relate to with it’s sincerity that it makes me tear up just thinking about it. Watching Muriel stumble through life to find her true self is a story we all can relate to. Add a fabulous soundtrack by ABBA and director PJ Hogans sweet look at “the ugly duckling” story makes this an instant classic in my book.

#5 - “Freeway”

For anyone who thinks that Reese Witherspoon is Hollywood’s sweetheart, they may want to check out this raunchy, over the top modern re-telling of the “Little Red Riding Hood” story. This movie is packed with quotable lines, deranged scenes of dark humor and hidden imagery. To say this movie is a camp classic is an understatement. I loved “Election” and “Legally Blonde” but this is her best comedic work. This movie delivers on all levels; laughs, drama, action, gore, comedy, slapstick and entertainment!

#4 - “Heavenly Creatures”

This is Peter Jackson’s first mainstream movie, and what a beautiful movie to look at it is! Full of breathtaking visuals and a gripping true to life plot, this movie is a roller coaster of cinematic emotions. Watching the two young actresses escape into a world of magic, terror and real to life issues you forget you are watching a fantasy thriller. Kate Winslet has to get the crown for BEST first feature ever by an actress! This role is that juicy and revealing. Watching this great flick you can see the brilliance of Peter Jackson start to emerge into the master of film he is today. This movie has the best screenplay out of the whole bunch listed here!

#3 - “Showgirls”

WHAT? “Showgirls”? Yes, I said “Showgirls”. This movie remains to be the most memorized, reviled, audacious and controversial of the movies I have listed. I like campy movies, but I also love blatant sexuality and crackling dialog. This movie offers up the best and worse that films have to give; bad acting, AWESOME one liners and nudity! This is my favorite “cult” film of all time. I may know almost every word of this admittedly terrible movie, but in my eyes, THAT is the mark of any “favorite” film….hands down.

#2 - “Welcome To The Dollhouse”

If I were to pick a movie that touched me and effected me emotionally, and made me reflect on life the most it would be this movie. Dawn Wiener is the sad, awkward, lonely pre-teen you would normally see as the punchline to many teen comedies. But here Dawn is a hero you relate to, with more personality and human qualities than most school teachers or bullies than I can remember. All of the sad life lessons and and harsh realities thrown at Dawn give us a painful perspective on the woe’s of growing up “different”. Your first love, fashion, sex and violence are touched on in this movie with a gentle, real feel. Dawn is truly one of the most inspiring characters to ever be filmed. The last 2 minutes of this movie are quietly moving and striking, it is the best one on this list! The honesty and raw performances by the young actors in this movie are something to be heralded!

#1 - “Hairspray”

Out of all of John Waters brilliant films, this one is not only my favorite, but it is my most watched film of all time. I remember watching this movie when I was twelve years old I couldn’t understand why I related to Traci Turnbladt’s over sized character so much. Now 18 years later, out of the closet and with a gaggle of plump fag hags under my belt, I know that this story is universal. This is a true under dog story. “Hairspray” is full of original zingers and eye catching scenery. The details that Waters uses to recreate the 50’s era in “Hairspray” give it a charming realism that is family friendly and cartoon like. The set design is eye popping and vibrant. The soundtrack is catchy, the writing comedic gold and Divine’s last performance before her death was sadly ignored by Oscar. This movie is colorful and timeless! Rikki Lake is fabulous as the bubbly Traci, in her first big screen role right role before slimming down. I am a bit skeptical about the big screen musical re-make…because this movie is so dear to my heart. But with the wealth of material provided and John Waters blessing there is no way it can go wrong! You know you have seen a movie too many times when you can even do all the dances, and yes I know each one featured in Hairspray.

Runners Up: “Flirting With Disaster”, “Best In Show”, “Babe”, “Existenz”, “Dead Alive”, “Cat On A Hot Tin Roof”, “Citizen Ruth”, “Dancer In The Dark”, “Donnie Darko”, “Strange Days”, “Go”, “Harold & Maude”, “The Nightmare Before Christmas”, “Ma Vie En Rose (My Life In Pink)”, “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape”, “Lucas”, “The Opposite Of Sex” and “Kids”.

I’ve never been a huge fan old holiday classics like “It’s A Wonderful Life”, “Miracle On 34th Street” or “White Christmas”. I prefer the more modern holiday classics. Here is my list of the best holiday movies to come out in the past 25 years.

1.) A Christmas Story - This is the best holiday movie ever. Full of classic Christmas scenes; the leg lamp, “you’ll shoot your eye out” and many more. The characters are timeless, and everyone can relate to the mayhem of Christmas dinner, photo’s w/ Santa and grandma’s home made gift (in this case it was bunny suit pajamas). This movie never gets old.

2.) The Nightmare Before Christmas - This is the best animated holiday movie out there, even those tired Rudolph and Frosty TV toons can’t compare to the brilliance of this picture. Tim Burton found a way to extend the Halloween scares into Christmas cheers. The soundtrack will last in your iPod from Oct. 1st through Dec 30th, keeping you in the holiday mood every step of the way. The songs, visuals and characters are timeless.

3.) Elf - This is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen, let alone a Christmas movie. The childlike energy of Will Ferrell’s character keeps the laughter and holiday vibes rolling along. This movie is sweet, charming and inventive. Zooey Deschanel’s dry wit gives this movie an adult feel balancing out the youthful energy of Christmas, making this a big kids holiday classic.

4.) Emmet Otter’s Jug Band Christmas - If you have not seen this genius, dark “Muppet” holiday movie, you were deprived as a child. Based on the holiday classic story “The Gift Of The Magi” this musical brings a flood of Christmas memories to mind. If you can get past the depressing subtext you will enjoy the music and production values of this early 80’s, lost Jim Henson gem.

5.) Bad Santa - This is the ultimate anti-Christmas movie. This movie says “Bah Fucking Humbug” to all sappy Christmas movies of the past. The “Badder Santa” version is nasty, mean and fun providing great laughs and many shocks at St. Nicks expense. Billy Bob’s performance is understated and hilarious, all of this makes for a great anti-”holiday” movie watching experience. Watch this movie after having a crappy X-Mas shopping day, it’ll bring you some holiday cheer.

6.) Scrooged - Bill Murray makes this movie a festive comedy classic with catchy one liners and memorable scenes. This movie spins the traditional telling of “A Christmas Carol” into a modern day holiday parable. Full of great holiday references and cheer, this movie will make any Scrooge laugh. This new take on a tired tale owes much of it’s greatness to the performances of Murray and Carol Kane as “the ghost of Christmas present”.

7.) National Lampoons Christmas Vacation - This movie is silly, poorly made and full of bad acting. But, how can you not laugh at the many frustrating scenes of Griswold holiday angst. From squirrels in the Christmas tree, to uninvited guests to Christmas light power outages this movie makes fun of the excruciating holiday family gathering perfectly.

8.) The Family Man - This Nicolas Cage charmer is my hidden gem out of the bunch listed here. When it was released in 2000 many critics loved the sweet nature of the story. Cage plays a hard nosed corporate big wig that laments his lonely life on Christmas Eve. He wakes up the next day as a “family man” with a wife and kids, with the inevitable lesson to be learned. But this movie is not heavy handed. You slowly fall in love with Cage’s grumpy guy as the ice slowly melts from his cold heart. This is a touching and cute Christmas film. This is my favorite “Capra-esque” holiday film.

9.) Home For The Holidays - Jodie Foster perfected the modern day holiday family get together movie with “Home For The Holidays”. This movie is the most realistic portrayal of the holidays on this list. Uncomfortable, hilarious, endearing and true to life “Holidays” delivers. The script is adult and fresh. Holly Hunter’s performance is fun and a stand out. This movie stands up to the test of time with each Christmas viewing.

10.) Home Alone - If you are like me then you have seen this movie hundreds of times. Each time you see it you can’t help but feel the Christmas energy, no matter what time of year it is. This has become a staple in the Christmas movie viewing tradition for most people who enjoy getting into the holiday mood.

“The Birds”:

Call me a wimp, call me crazy but this classic Alfred Hitchcock film still creeps me out. The idea of birds attacking a small town may be too weak for some, but I think this movie holds up to the test of time. Nature against man has never been so gruesome.

“Dawn Of The Dead” (2004):

This movie is the BEST zombie flick out there. I love the black and white original from the 50’s but this re-make of the 70’s sequel is gory in all the right places. Zombie movies are my favorite of the horror genre. This movie is relentless with its action shots. Where else can you get metaphors on consumerism and zombie babies?

“Evil Dead 1 & 2″:

I put this series together because each is scary, funny and gross on its own but they play like a full length feature back to back. Where one movie makes you cringe the other makes you want to barf, and then laugh out loud…yep it’s that fun.

“Invasion Of The Body Snatchers” (1978):

You have to have some aliens in your Halloween movie mix. This is the best alien invasion movie ever made. It may seem dated, but with classic shots through San Francisco and the uber scary ending give this movie a stylish creepiness most alien movies do not have.

“Jeepers Creepers 2″:

This is a scary movie, but I put it on my list because it is the gayest horror movie ever made. We get to watch the half naked, hot, buffed football team picked away one by one by a super nasty “Creep” with gory and funny results. There is even a gay ass “The Birds” reference in the beginning if you can catch it.

“The Hills Have Eyes” (2006):

I was reluctant to choose this over “Hostel”. Both movies are seriously nasty and gory. This movie, once it gets started, doesn’t stop with the insanity. A true horror/splatter fest, this movie delivers some of the most uncomfortable death scenes on this list. The best horror re-make EVER!

“The Nightmare Before Christmas”:

Who said all Halloween movies have to be bloody and gory? This movie will get you in the mood for Halloween and then slide you right into Christmas. That is great holiday movie coverage if you ask me. This movie is sweet, dark and the soundtrack is catchy. A great “breather” between the gore.

“The Shining”:

We get Stephen King, Jack Nicolson and Kubrick in this horror classic, which is a lot. I will watch this movie every time it is on TV. It still makes me cringe and feel “icky”. Some scenes stay etched in your mind long after viewing. Jack Nicolson is genius in this movie, truly scary.

“The Exorcist”:

Some of the scariest movies are the ones we think are most likely to happen in real life. This movie straddles that line. Is this real? Can it happen? Nothing is more frightening than the last 30 minutes of this classic.

“Halloween”:

I would say the music in this movie alone gives me goose bumps. The mask on the stalking main character still scares me, with its cold stare. Michael Meyers silent, menacing character has a way of scaring you while doing nothing but just standing there, very still. EWWW, that is creepy! And the title alone gives this movie the edge on this list.

MUSIC:

Nelly Furtado “Loose”
Lily Allen - “Alright Still”
The Dixie Chicks - “Taking The Long Way Home”
Zero 7 - “The Garden”
The Flaming Lips - “At War With The Mystics”
Gnarls Barkley - “St. Elsewhere”
Morrissey - “Ringleader Of The Tormentors”
Belle & Sebastian - “The Life Pursuit”
The Scissor Sisters - “Ta Dah”

MOVIES:

- “Lady In The Water”
- “Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang”
- “The Hills Have Eyes”
- “Clerks II”
- “V For Vendetta”
- “Little Miss Sunshine”
- “Snakes On A Plane”